Daughters Helping Their Moms
I am the daughter of a domestic violence survivor. My father, Mike Rinder, out of the blue, attacked my mom and broke her shoulder in front of my eyes.He caused her nerve damage that will never be able to be healed. She’s had to have years of physical therapy. She’s had an operation. The list goes on.
When my father, Mike Rinder, brutally and viciously attacked my mother and hurt her to the point where she will never ever heal for the rest of her life, that’s when I decided okay, I want to give other people ideas of what they can do if they’re in the similar situation. I think it so important that daughters support their mom in the wake of domestic violence because that’s a very hard time for them. And for my mom it was and so that’s why I think it’s so important to help your mom when you need to and specifically in a situation of a domestic violence attack.
In the case of my mom first, we had to get medical attention right away. And then after that she didn’t even realize how bad it was and I made her show me her arm. And I said, “Mom, show me your arm.” And she showed it to me and she took the bandages off after the, you know, the immediate first aid. And when I looked down—“Oh my God!” And this was five days later. And it was blistered and red and swollen and she was in pain. And she didn’t even realize how, how bad off she was—physically. How much damage had been done by this attack by Mike Rinder. So you have to really insist that they get the correct medical attention. It’s very important. So that’s the very first thing.
The next most important thing is to be there for them and to do anything you can to help them, to comfort them, to love and to help them get through that situation. In the case of my mom and what I did after my father, Mike Rinder, broke her shoulder, damaged her nerves, injured her for life, is I was there for every second of the day. And whether that be helping her make her bed, I’d help her get dressed ‘cause she had to get special clothes made because of the injuries to her arm. She couldn’t move it. I drove her where she needed to go. I took her to her doctors’ appointments. I, you know, cut her food. Whatever it is that they’re going to need.
Lastly, everything you do, do it with a lot of compassion, because I think it was one of the most important things that helped my mom after she was attacked—was the care and comfort.So do for them what you can and do what you can to make them comfortable. Make them feel good. Help them with whatever they’re gonna have to do to get through that pain. Be there and care.
Thank you.And I hope I have helped you helped someone you know experiencing a similar situation.